12-21-2012, here we come!

Dear friends, foes, fellows and fleeting passers-by,

Are you prepared for 12/21/2012? As you may have heard, by now, many ancient sources including the Mayan Calendar (which, after centuries of predicting the future, ENDS on that day), biblical references, Nostradamus, the I Ching, The Cheechin Chong, and others, have determined that day to be the end of our time here on the planet. In fact, the planet itself, is considered to be doomed, or potentially so.

I'm very pleased about all that. It means the end of my obsession with collecting crap that I, obviously, will never be able to use. I can now look forward to spending any moneys I may have been required to store away, and not have to worry about the future! I'll actually be able to sleep more soundly with that lump gone from my mattress. Nice!

It will also mean the end, FInally, of Jay Leno's shows! That putz has been annoying America for years with his unfunnyness. HAH! GoodBYE, Jay! GoodBYE, Rap music! GoodBYE, humdrum humor and museless music forEver! Bwahahahahaha!

All those people who've been complaining about pollution as being the end of us will then have to admit they overshot their forebodings! We can now toss out plastic bags like it's going out of style!

I say, let's go on an endangered species feeding binge! Spotted Owl eggs with albino Tiger rolls! Porpoise Pie and Dolphin dumplings for everybody! Pandas roasting over an open Whale bonfire with Jack Terriers nipping on their toes! Yuletide squirrels being hung by the fire and folks dressed up like Eskimos! Hell, let's eat them too!

In fact, I say all indigenous peoples that have been denying us our God-given right to eat anything that flies, crawls, climbs, and scurries around in the Rain-forests, should be tossed into the mix, as well. With those bones in their noses, they've been BEGging to be deboned, and are sure to be a culinary delight! Did I hear someone say, "Natives-in-a-blanket"? Yum!

(The opinions expressed herein do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the author)

Springing back

Well, spring is upon us, and I'm wound up tighter than a Bumble Bee's bum. It's been a long cold winter, baby, and the sun has been warm and taunting. February had some 80 degree temps, but it was still a long season. At least from my pov. It's now officially spring, and nearly summer, and, like the seasons, my life has evolved.

For one, you may have noticed the Simpsonized me! The resemblance is amazing, no? I've always been drawn to cartoons. Here, I am drawn AS one!! Love that! WOOHOO!! The best show in the history of tv is in it's 19th(? DOH!) season, and never any better.

My son is in Korea now. He expects to be there for at least a year, possibly two. Hopefully, it'll be as uneventful as his stint in Iraq, earlier this year. God bless you, son. I love you.

Here's one of the pics he sent with him and a friend he was stationed with in Misawa. hmmmm...ever the hugger!

I've started to expand my "garden of eatin'" with some Pumpkins, Watermelon, and, of course, my 'maters. I did some landscaping to try and pretty up the joint, too. I've raked!! Heck, I may even MOW!! Right? WOOHOO!!

I'll probably transplant my herbs into pots, this weekend. the weather s'posed to be rainy, but I'll work between the drops. I've done it before, by gum! I'll do 'er agin!

Been diligently workin' on "the Bay" (eBay, that is; cyber gold; Texas Tea). My hovel is a mess with all the shipping supplies and several plethoras of ebayable stuff all queued and askewed; a'rarin' to be sold or rejected. Its pretty exciting, really. I've been amassing, hoarding, collecting, saving, keeping, and storing stuff ever since I was old enough to have a place to store it, and a surface to place it on. I suffered through many ex-wife comments about my keeping stuff that only takes up space. So, now, I'm feeling quite vindicated that I'm finally able to unload. Ebay came along at a great time. Thank you Cyber Gods. Thank you!

The down side (up side? latteral side?) is that I also have been buying cd's and dvd's with some of the $$ I gained from selling! DOH! However, I love music, so I'm ok with my self-indulgence.

I got tickets for Thomas Point Beach Bluegrass fest this year. It's been a couple years since I could afford it. I'm looking forward to it. Plus, my bro Ray will be coming with me. It'll be the second time in our lives that we'll be doing something together besides hanging out as kids. (well, if you discount all the mischief and mayhem we generated as the trouble-making twosome of yore.

He also plans on moving up here from Mass next year, so we can get together more often. We'll see, I guess.

Got my MC back on the road! Or, at least, on the driveway. I've yet to venture out on it. It's been about 13 years since I rode it, so I'm basically back to learning all over again....sigh.....

Well, sir blogger, I guess I'd better sign off for now. It was nice writing on you again. Sorry it's been so long. I hope you forgive me and we can be blogger and blog again. Please?

He's ba-a-a-ack!

My boy is out of that Iraqian hell and back in Japan! Woohoo!! . More on this and other unrelated developments in the not-too-distant future. Changes are a happ'nin' for the betterment and improvementationalisticism of my frugal, yet optimistic, life. Details at 11.

If I Tell You That I Love You

If I tell you that I love you
will you come back home to me?
If I rush to you and hug you
will you hug back tenderly?

If I write a million times that
I need you in my life
will you share your heart with me
and be my loving wife?

Please, my dear, I've got to know, cause all I want is you.
I promise if you come with me, my love will e'er be true.
My pain is deep as Jordan, dear, and hard as I may try,
I cannot go through any day without tears in my eyes.

If I bring the stars upon the earth
and hand to you the moon,
will then you come to see me love
and do it very soon?

If angels come to sing my praise
will you listen to them?
When they tell you of my love,
will you take me back again?

Please,my dear, I've got to know, cause all I want is you.
I promise if you come with me, my love will e'er be true.
My pain is deep as Jordan, dear, and hard as I may try,
I cannot go through any day without tears in my eyes.

If I make a daisy chain
of kisses to your heart
will you close your pretty eyes?
Will your lips then part?

If I turn a glass of water
into sweet red wine,
will thou open up for me
and let me to be thine?

Please, my dear, I've got to know, cause all I want is you.
I promise if you come to me, my love will e'er be true.
My pain is deep as Jordan, dear, and hard as I may try,
I cannot go through any day without tears in my eyes.

I'll plead with all the saints and devils, if it needs to be
to get you back into my arms and loving only me.
Please, my dear, I've got to know, cause all I want is you.
I swear to God and on my soul, my love will e'er be true.

Old pics

One of me and my father. I might have been 3 or 4 with my cowboy clothes and my mini pompadour. I look like a young Little Ricky Ricardo! I was a real tiger. I was living with my grandparents because parental responsibilities were something my father didn't want to deal with. When I was a very young boy at this age, and when he was around, we would sit on my grandfather's front porch. I would play the drums and my father would play the guitar. The neighbors would walk by and toss coins on the porch. That was my last paying gig. DOH!

Next is me and my brother Ray. This was taken in 1966. I was 18 and he was 16. I'd just returned from living in Washington state after 3 years. I rarely get to see him still. Miss you, my bro.

New pics

Well, obviously my sun(or, dad)flower came out. It didn't graze the clouds, exactly, but it did breach the fencing. Such a sunny li'l disposition, too! The next is a tomato that came out with an attitude. It came with it's own handle. On the face of things, it's not. The tale is really about the tail. The end

The Blues are for the Soul

Blues Are For The Soul


They say the blues are for the people
struggling with their lives.
They say that when you sing the blues
your spirit comes alive.

I don't know if that's true or not
I've never had that life
I've been around from town to town
and had my share of strife

I've been alone and had no home
women have left me flat
I've had no friends at my day's end
And felt the pain of that

But I think blues are for the soul
the hurt; they comfort well
They open up my heart to spill
my loneliness out from hell

It seems like they can make me feel
better than when I awoke
I hum the blues, I take a sip
and then I take a toke

They say the blues are for the spirit
though that may well be true
I feel my soul is the rightful heir
to comfort from the blues.
09/28/07

Lookin' back at the future

HELLOOO-OOO!!!

Well, here it is, the end of June. I haven't written for many months. Sorry, Blog. I was BUsy!! ok? Seriously busy. Life has offered some surprises and I'm still adjusting. (mmmph...there, that feels better).

Let's see; my son has been very successful in his endeavors in the Air Force. His weapons crew competed against a crew in Iraq, and actually beat them! Woohoo!! He's garnered several achievement medals and plaques. He's also been transferred to Iraq, where he expects to be until Sept or Oct. Needless to say; I miss him very much. I've spoken with him a couple times on the phone. He left me a great Father's Day message which I saved, of course.

He is not dismayed by his situation, nor disappointed by his decision to join the Air Force. I'm super proud of him. He's a wonderful young man and stepping up as a great person. I love you so much, my son. God be with you.

I'm missing him very much and cannot wait to hold and hug him once again.

Here's a collage I'm still making. These are just a few of my favorite pics of him. I'll re-post it when I'm done. How cute is he?? haha! Love you, son.

My garden, such as it is, is doing pretty well, all things considered. The 'maters are as tall as my sexy moustache (at least, that's what my lovey thinks about my stache of 75% salt and 25% pepper). There are some cute li'l 'materettes just a growin' and smilin' all OVer those plants. I have one of smaller size and one of normal. Here's the not-so-latest pic of that.

The fencing was put up because I had planted some Sunflowers and they got et by some underpawed li'l rodents. Upon discovering that dastardly deed, I was near to tears!! Well, maybe not tears, but, goshdarn it; I was livered! (private joke). Anywho, it apparently was larger than a mouse, yet smaller than a full grown bunny, so I'm guessing it was a chipmunk. In addition to the fencing you see here, I also put a smaller grid of fencing around the re-planted sunflowers. It worked, and the sunnies are finally growing! Woohoo!! I've never had Sunflowers before and I'm beside myself (well, fairly close to myself) with glee! I'll be sure to post some pics here when they finally bloom.

My herbs are doing well, in their average sized pots. Next year, I'll buy some larger ones. I might also use 5 gallon buckets. I have Chives, Tarragon, Oregano, Basil (withOUT the rath bone), and sweet Rosemary. They are doing very good, thank you, being nourished with my Paquie's poopywater. Pictures included.

My garden of eatin'

Oh! I forgot the radishes! Notice the big wide container. They're doing SUpah! They're getting to be very big and reddish radishes. They're the big surprise because I never grew those either and am so pleased. I'll probably grow them in the ground next year. I asked the NH agri people if I could grow them over my septic system and they assured me it'd be ok. I was afraid that everything would be poopoopoisonous, but I guess not. Hmmmmm...I've already started growing a smaller batch in some smaller pots. Perhaps, I'll put them on the ground and see if any of the local rodentia will be interested in partaking of them. However; I'll probably be looking to build some fencing around the proposed garden area anyway. Don't want dem dam bunnies eatin' me veggies.

You (who?), may notice that there are two buckets there with other greenery. Well, those are not doing so well. They were pumpkins and watermelons. The buckets had no drainage holes (well, drain my sauce and pluck me like a chicken! how STUpid is THAT?) so the heavy rains we had this season has nearly left them kaput. Next year, I'll put them in the ground.

Speaking of the Paqster; he's doing very nicely. I recently changed his green container for a yellow one. I think the bright color will cheer him up! He hasn't shed any scutes (?) this year. Don't know why. He won't answer me!

My hovel is still in a semi state of disarray as I struggle to devoid it of useless stuff. HA! Fat chance! Old farts may die, but old habits just linger and grow.

Missing you, missing me.

Well, this is a very depressing day for me and I'm guessing it's because I'm so tired due to getting to bed so late lately as of late. (Even depression and exhaustion doesn't prevent my inate silliness).
I put on an Alan Parsons cd (best of, vol 2) and it reminded me of you, son, as I expressed in my email to you.
All those times we would sing and laugh and smile with those songs in the van seem so far back and yet, the smiles and joy feels like yesterday.
One of my most cherished memories is of the times when I would tuck you into bed and you would be smiling and all giddy and squirming like you had snakes in you. The pure happiness to be alive was in your eyes and face and I would smile back and, with all the seriousness I could muster, I would say; "Jolin. I love you SOOOO much, son. Do you know how much Daddy loves you?" You'd answer with a silly giggle or close your eyes and appear to shiver inside with happiness. Those looks made me so f'ing happy. I cannot describe how happy it made me to see you that happy. It was rewarding to me to see that I COULD make somebody so happy; that I was capable of showing what I wanted to be shown, and doing it without subterfuge or deceipt and alternative motives. Sometimes I would caress your cheek with my hand and you would scrunch up and get all tickley. Other times you would grab my hand and hold it to your face and smile and I thought I would die from happiness, right there and then.
Son, I know you're in a relatively safe place, in Japan, but I miss you and worry for your continued safety. I am so proud of the happiness I was able to give you as a child., and for the way you turned out as a person.
I thank the Gods that I was able to give you the happiness I wanted as a child. I'm not sure how all this computes on a psychological level or what it says about me, but I know I am SO very pleased with the way I was able to gather myself together, in spite of my own childhood unhappiness, and turn it around for you. The tears flowing now both reflect my gratitude for that opportunity and for the result; a happy youngster who felt the love of his mom and dad; that, and the sadness I felt for not having had that myself.
I know I'm sounding pitifully self-absorbed now, but shit, I am so sad that I didn't have what was so simple to give; love and the happiness of knowing and feeling that love.
Redundantly; Thank You God for allowing me that for you. God bless you, son. I love you and miss you from the depths of my heart and soul.
I also thank God for giving me the ability to ignore my own sexual abuse as a kid and not pass that on to you. So many victims continue the abuse. You're not aware of any of those things and if/when you find out, please try and understand that it was the strength of my love for you and the recognization of what's right and wrong that kept me from doing the things that were done to or in front of me. Whatever wrongs you may see in life, you have the opportunity and ability to change that pattern and be a better person and make others happier because of it.
I grew up with the feelings of abandonment, sexual abuse, too much alone time on the streets, alcohol abuse, rejection, and I was determined not to show you any of those things that could/would hurt you. I was successful in that endeavor and I must admit to pride. I know that most people take responsible parenting for granted, but having come from such a fucked up childhood, it was almost expected to pass that on to you, as most people from dysfunctional backgrounds end up duplicating their own childhoods; probably out of anger. The anger I felt/feel was not directed at you, thank God, but at the people who actually were the cause of my misery; my parents. And, as hard as it might be to understand that; it's valid, to me, and was a major factor in my development. The result of which, is a 58 yr old man who has very few friends because he doesn't know how to deal with people; and tends to push people away for reasons he's not able to comprehend, much less, articulate.
I always wanted to be a person that people loved, but never really felt deserving and certainly offered little in the way of motivation for people to do that. I spent so much time alone, that I didn't develop, nor was shown, those skills that are conducive to being loved. Which is not to say that I haven't been loved. I know that I have been loved by many people. It's just so darned hard to show gratitude for something that I don't feel worthy of. And, that thought makes me sad because EVERYbody should feel loved and has a right to that; yet, I've never really, TRUly felt deserving of that. Jesus, talk about redundant! I think I may have reiterated everything here several times in multiple ways.
Done.

I'm a Homeowner!! Woohoo!!

Finally signed ze papers and am in the moving process. Been moving for a couple weeks, now. Don't expect to be done until end of November. Working 9+ hrs a day, then off to castle to unload from previous eve's loading. Then, straighten out and put away what I can put away; then back to old place to load up until 11 or 12; up at 6am. It's exhausting and I haven't even touched, cept for one small load of camping gear, the 20'X10'X10' storage bin yet. I'm throwing away stuff left and right, up and down, over here and over there. Obsessive as I am, this concept of "throwing stuff away" is foreign to my sensibilities, and always a despised task. However; I really need to downsize my personal effects. I'll be going through all my "collectibles" and either selling or tossing. It's a very scary process but one that needs to be done. Besides; I can always get MORE STUFF!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

More Cece's wedding pics

My darling niece, sweet Cece, and her lucky husband Jay at their nuptials this past summer. This fall she'll be opening up her own convenience store. Such an ambitious spirit; a shining star of the family. Love ya, Cece.
Here's my handsome mug with my bro Ray

The very proud dad; my bro Joe with the glowing bride.

9-11 X 5

9-11, 5 years later. Osama is still on the loose. So is Bush. Neither seem likely to be rounded up and dealt with properly in the near future. Pretty sad today. The memories of the twin towers and those people jumping out of windows; life-saving, and giving police, fire, and EMT's; many never returning; all of it just settles in my head and won't go away. How does one not wish the worst pain and death to those responsible and supportive of such a horrible act against humanity.

FMouie - electric blue

Blue me in the palm

Just another fun pic I wanted to share

Summer break

I know it's a bit late, for Independence Day, but this is a great pic and I wanted to see it here.

God Bless America.

colorful cast of characters collage

No comment please!

Just me, lis'nin' to myself whine

Well, the house-hunting mission may come to a close. I've declared interest and paid-down for a place up north. Nice li'l "manufactured home" on 5+ acres. It's not too large, but big enough for me to not have to throw away ALL my stuff. If all comes to pass, I'll close on Sept 26, 2006. I'll finally have a piece of the rock to leave you Jol. The land will be the prize, even if the "manufactured home" will age.
It's very very hot lately. Popcorn is imPOSSible to keep in a bag. The locals are cooling themselves by reaching under their seats for a cold piece of dirt to stuff in their shoes. It creates a sorta sweat-mud that makes you feel like you're gellin'. I prefer the cold slab o' balogna in my shorts for that fresh feeling of cool meat. Nothing like beatin' the heat with a cool hunk o' meat.




My dear friend Cathy came up for a few weeks and we had an evening of fun and chat. She wanted a pic of me, in redneck mode, in this tee honoring the ol' man of the mountain (or is it mountin'?). I tried to work that pic on to the top of this paragraph, but couldn't do it, so I just left it there. Course...that's par for the course for my relatively limited compuknowledge. Ahhh..THERE'S my whine! (sipping from the bota of whine that I carry with me at all times)

Honey anyone?

Just a FMouie

Angela

Great pic of my friend Angela. We were celebrating something or another. Good times.

Cece shoots on the roll

I took this pic just as my niece Cece fell backwards as she took a pic of her dad, my bro Joe, as he walked by. love it!

I've been cybereyesed!!

No real reason for this pic other than I just wanted to see it here. Sorta how I feel sometimes after playing for hours.

Cece's wedding, etc

Well, these are pics of my darling niece; Cece on her wedding. The pics are of her and her family; my brother Joe, his wife Pat, Cece's sister Suzie, Suzie's daughter Adrianna, who looks very much like her grandmother; my sister Linda, and a li'l girl whose name I cannot recall. Holy shit!! I'm a Great Uncle!!
It was a great time.
On another front; the house I was almost into fell through. It had too many problems that the owners didn't want to address by lowering the price. I backed out. My "agent" was another factor. She totally sucked and offered little support or assistance on my behalf. Back to the drawing board with a new agent. We'll see how it all works out.
My son is doing well in Japan.
Love you Jol.

The latest

Well, the film project; "Talk" has been completed. I attended the first screening, which was a rough cut edit. It was a fun experience and the film itself is pretty good.
The funniest part was that after all my proud claims of the filmmaker's exhortations of my able assistance and that I was his "angel/savior" and that he couldn't have done it as well without my input; he neglected to add my name to the credits!!! I thought I would die from the irony. Laughed my ass off.
Stephanie went with me and it was a fun experience all around.
Finally, after 10 years, got my bike back on the road. Cost me a cool $900+, not counting registration and insurance. Can't use it until I have insurance, but, it shouldn't take too long. Now, my concern is that my roommate/landlord/curmudgeon/old-fart will give me shit to park it there at the place again.
House-hunting is in full swing, but the limitations are choking the elan out of my expectations. Really want to get this shit moving.
Finally got an e-mail address from my son in Japan! WOOHOO!! Now, I can send him all kinds o' shit!!

Bro Joe's B'day 5/1/06

Bro Joe had his 50a birthday on 5/1/6. This was one of several cards I made to commemorate that auspicious occasion.

New birthday card

Here's one of my newest greeting cards I made for friend Stephanie. Just thought I'd share.

I think I'm turning Japanese...I really think so

Ahhhhhh so. aturning...ajapanesa.

I don't know Jack.

This is the new me! Ignore the date. Sorta got a Jack Nicholson look going here. Lost the nose in an eating accident.

Nothing need be said!

Mad Monkey love with Molly the Maid

This is my sweetheart Molly the Maid. She lives at Angela's but she's REALly mine. She stands there and holds my drink, looking so damned perky and so veddy Br-r-ritish. Someday, we may run away together. Well...I'll run. She'll hold my drink for me. I'll carry her to our secret lair and we'll make mad passionate monkey love.
The end.

One year anniversary

O
MEIN
GOTT!

Just realized this is 3 days after the one year anniversary of my blog!! I'm really enjoying it and we've had a lot of fun together (blushing). I'm sure my interest will continue to grow. Each time i post, I F E E L the love. You know? I'm F E E L ing the passion of requited love. There's a bond we've achieved that no diary, or journal could EVER come between! In fact; I'd like to repeat my vows.
Ahem....I vow to love, honor, and maintain you til the clouds stop forming; til the poets run out of wine; til wine turns to water; til the oceans become pools; til the pool boys turn to poets; til the poets run....anyway, my blog; you KNOW how I feel. I shall always feel that, til the day I lose my keyboard. Amen

Easter 2006

Well, it's close to Easter...sort of a ...near'easter, as we call it here in the wild Nor'east.
Things are a poppin' all over de plaise. I'm in the midst of the film production; "Talk", a student film project. The story is about bad cops (whatcha gonna do when they come fo you) gone badder. It's being shot at several locations including, Boston, Tyngsboro Ma, and Manchester. I played a small bit as a "redneck" dock worker. However; I feel my real contribution has been my many suggestions, and recommendations with regards to the script, production, camera work, makeup, and directing. All but a couple were accepted as an improvement. And, general gophering. I also did the camera work for a few scenes. It's a wonderful experience and I'm having a ball.
I really enjoy being able to stretch my creativity to areas I've always wanted to be a part of, but never had the opportunity.
It being my first involvement in anything like this, I'm fairly aflutter with glee. If I wore panties, they would be moistened many times over. However; slut that I am, I rarely wear em. HA! Take THAT, world!
Also, I am in the throes of passionate house-hunting. I've loaded my house gun and I'm on the stalk. Which, is not to be confused with being on A stalk. I'm looking' in a northerly fashion towards Concord or thereabouts. I'm extremely anxious to get a place that offers me more options than one room and a pee-closet; the shower stall notwithstanding.
I long for rooms, and yard, and trees, and the relative silence of the country sans highway noises; like ambulances, and all the et ceteras, etc. I yearn for windows to look out of onto my own property, and window sills to place my plants, and walls to hang my pictures, and shelves to display my odds and ends, and evens and middles, and Simpsons figurines, and Beatle records, and dental records, and cleverly painted and posed roadkill that will grace the walls.
Ok, I'm kidding about the roadkill...they'll be out of the way, in the freezer.
I'm anxious to have a place with privacy to bring my sweety, once I get a sweety; and other guests, and have parties, and play music anytime, and use the TELEPHONE!!, and get a dog, and a cat, and a ferret, and a zebra, and a very little itsy-bitsy teeny weeny flea circus again. I'll train all the fleas myself, and read them the accolades in the press! This time, however, I won't introduce the dog into the act. The last time, they all left! I was broke! My savings account was empty! The checking acct was gone! Course, Fred the dog still had a li'l scratch.

I feel a poem coming on...

Easter, my Easter, wherefore art thou?
Thou art in the spring, aren't thou now?
How furled my brow, that thou won't allow
that truth be known; there's an Easter Cow.


Well, that totally sucked and I apologize for that. I apologize to you all and y'all and the the rest of humanity AND cowmanity as well. Fuck the bunnymanity; they're a bunch of scared rabbits. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I went to Angela's for Easter dinner. Of course, she made way too much great food and I stuffed myself like the fatted calf I'm for heifer doing, whenever I eat there. She's a great cook, and I always enjoy our meals.
Anyway, that's my Easter offering. If My meme saw this, she would f'ing KILL me for my blasphemy, but, she's dead and I apologize to her as well. I guess the sense of absurdity I've grown to accept is not really what she would want, but, hey, I gotta be me, and I am only a product of my environment...and a few head vacations
when it was beneficial.
Yours, sincerely;
J. Effingham Broadbottom.

Happy STD free SPD!

Yes, it's past SPD, but. I thought I'd include this anyway. I'll be posting the cards I make as they become finalized, or relevant.

never forget

Newest pic

This is the latest pics of my son. Looking handsome and dedicated. Off to Japan soon. Godspeed, son. I love you.
Oh yeah; and one of your father.